the cost of character...

"A man lays the foundation of true greatness when he becomes more concerned with building his character than with expanding his reputation." - William A. Ward

When I was in 6th grade I did something most 6th graders only dream of. I pulled off an enormous feat. Something so extraordinary that when I look back on it now, I am still astounded at my ability to engineer something so methodical yet so sinister. I was good... and I knew it. 

It was the Christmas season of 1993. It was my brother's turn to open up the present that I had probably spent three dollars on at the school Santa Shop. I knew it wasn't anything special... I only bought gifts for my brothers because I had to. It was a fake gold chain. As my brother opened his present he screamed with excitement. You would have thought I bought him a Super Nintendo. I had no idea such a cheap gift that I spent zero time picking out would cause such a commotion. My brother loved it. Over the next week I became extremely jealous over his love for the necklace. I began to wish I had bought it for myself. 

As a kid I would attend an Awana's program at a local baptist church every Friday night. On one occasion I begged my brother to wear the necklace. I thought for sure I would get the attention that I had known all too well. My notions were confirmed when I showed up that night. I walked around puffed up as kids began to notice my borrowed status symbol. Little did they know that it really wasn't anything special. They had no idea that it was already starting to tarnish and would sometimes leave a bluish-green stain around my neck. Later that night a boy much younger than I approached me with a proposition. He began to tell me that for Christmas his Grandmother had given him not one, but two crisp one hundred dollar bills. I had never even seen a hundred dollar bill before. I doubted their existence so he pulled them out of his pocket and instantly I was awestruck.  It didn't take long to make me a believer. He then told me that he was prepared to give one of the hundred dollar bills to me in exchange for my brothers necklace. Well, I didn't even hesitate... I mean come on, do you know how many cheap necklaces I can buy with one hundred dollars! It was the perfect scandal... and I was rich. I even ended up telling my brother I had lost his necklace and I never had to buy him a new one. Many years later I shared that story with my family. They couldn't believe I did such a horrible thing. It really was awful.  What is even more awful is the way it reflected my fractured character at such a young age. 

I once heard someone say, "Character is what you are when nobody is looking." I remember when having "good character" used to be an important thing to aim for. Unfortunately, I'm beginning to believe it's something less sought after these days. I feel like everyday I hear about people who are willing to whore out their integrity in the search of self-gain. Whatever happened to the desire to do what is right... even when nobody else is watching? Does striving for integrity still exist? Is altruism real? I believe it is... I know it is. I write this to serve as a reminder. All too often I find myself looking back on good intentions that never really surface because I'm too lazy to grapple over what I want and what is right. I forget that righteous character is worth fighting for! 

Are you contributing to the demise of good character? Do you find yourself reluctant to fight for what is virtuous and honorable? Do you willingly hand over your integrity for instant gratification? It's easy to do... we all do it. But if there is ever going to be hope for this world, it requires people who are willing and ready to stand up and do battle with themselves. People who will do the right thing even if nobody notices. It starts with the small things. Is the character of Christ worth fighting for? What will it take... what do you need to do?

a heart like freddie...

I woke up this morning with an intense desire to stay under my warm covers all day. Since when is Pittsburgh, PA supposed to feel like the arctic tundra? It's freaking cold outside! As I got ready for my day I lamented over the amount of time it would take for me to scrape away the many layers of ice on my car. Days like these make me consider investing in one of those remote control starters! Bundled up in all of my warm attire... I waited as my garage door screeched open and the subzero air instantly engulfed my domain. I could hardly take a breath. As I walked toward my car I suddenly realized my predicament wasn't what I thought it would be. In fact, I had no predicament at all because someone had taken the time to scrape the ice off my car for me. I felt so fortunate. I looked around and saw that not only was my car scraped off, but all of my neighbor's cars were shed of their icy enclosures as well! Standing there across the street was my neighbor Freddie. He had spent the morning scraping all of the cars before people left for work. I couldn't believe he would do such a kind thing. 

Later that day I stopped by the house to grab a sandwich before I headed out to another meeting. While pulling into my driveway I realized that someone had shoveled my sidewalk and driveway. As I got out of my car I realized that a number of my other neighbors driveways and sidewalks were shoveled as well. The sight of this caught me off-guard because many of my neighbors are gone all day at work. I glanced across the street and there was Freddie... red faced and sweaty. Freddie spent the morning shoveling and salting the neighborhood. Who does that? Apparently Freddie...! I showered him with thanks and appreciation. That kind of service really meant a lot to me. 

After a long day, I was anxious to come home and eat some dinner with my wonderful wife. In the middle of dinner I got a phone call... it was Freddie. He told me to come to the front door, so I did. There Freddie stood with a plate of freshly made pumpkin cake with cream cheese icing. It was incredible... like manna from heaven!

Ok... let me just say this.... I think Freddie loves Jesus more than I do! Seriously... this man blows my mind. To have a heart like that... to bless people... to make an impact... to serve. It's just not natural. This attitude is a God-given gift and I don't even think Freddie knows it. Freddie is showing me the love of Jesus... and I want him to know it. I had a conversation with Freddie a few months ago about God and the church. He told me he would never step foot in a church again. Many years ago he worshipped weekly at a church with his family. He worked multiple jobs to meet his families needs and did everything he could to provide. Freddie found himself struggling to make ends meet... but was too proud to ask for help. A preacher at his church approached Freddie one Sunday to ask him to up his giving to help support the church budget. Freddie explained his current financial situation to the preacher and expressed his remorse for not being able to give more. The preacher responded with this... "I believe God wants me to tell you to take another job so that you can give more money to the church." Freddie left and never returned. 

Freddie loves Jesus but hates the church. Unfortunately,... I can't blame him. I wished a quarter of all church goers were like Freddie. It would make a huge impact on this world. I want a heart like Freddie... because Freddie has a heart like Jesus. I hope you have a Freddie in your life!

the weight of fear....

If you know me... you know that I have a paralyzing fear. A fear that haunts me to the core. This fear to some may seem unrealistic... but to me it is very real. I have an insatiable fear of Zombies. Go ahead... get it out of your system. Laugh and point. But i'm not laughing. I am wetting my pants. Even reading the word Zombie sends shivers down my spine. My friend just purchased a brand new video game based on a Zombie Apocalypse. Just trying to play this game makes me scream like a little girl. I'm serious,... people would pay money to watch me play the game. Zombies scare me. They always have... and always will. 

Although, i'm really not ignorant enough to believe Zombies walk the Earth... I truly believe if they did... i'd be ready. I know exactly what I would do if there was an outbreak. I have had lengthy conversations about fighting tactics, defense mechanisms,

and survival. I have even read Max Brook's book: The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead. My fear has created this obsession with preparing for the worst. My fear has prepared me for the future. So,... not if, but when the outbreak happens... you know who to talk to.

Fear is a funny thing. People do some incredible things because of fear, others do nothing. Fear. We all taste it... what ever it is for us... we know it well. We know what is smells like... what it feels like under our skin. We can hear fear screaming in our ears. Whether it's fear of failure, resistance or self-doubt... we know every aspect of our fear. We've played out the different scenarios in our head of how to avoid it at all costs. Fear, if you let it, will dominate you. It will stop you in your tracks and bury you. I know this feeling all to well. Too many times in my life I've let fear make up my mind for me. 

Some of my biggest heroes in life have faced fear, looked deep in it's eyes and kept on going. It's not that fear hasn't been in the way for them... they just didn't let it change their course. I want to live like that. I want to see fear... and charge right through it. I'm not naive enough to think my heroes don't have fear... they do... but they don't let it make decisions for them. I want to walk with firm steps... knowing that I am not alone and fear has no authority over me. I want to live like I believe Isaiah 41:10 

Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. 

Do you know your fear like it's a part of you? Have you gone to extreme lengths because fear has taken you there? Know this: the only weight fear has is the weight you give it. Fear does not have the last word. God has already given you the ability to stare fear in the face... and keep on going. You just have to believe it and then do it. What will it take for you to walk with confidence knowing that God will see you through your fear? You may discover that you have been given strength you didn't even know you had! 

long time, no see...

My life has been chaotic for the past few months. Hence why I haven't written anything on here in a while. With everything that goes along with planting a church, working part-time with The Pittsburgh Kids Foundation and attempting to be a good husband... extra minutes in a day are few and far between. The past few months have forced me to appreciate the short silent moments I randomly discover throughout the day. I value them. I wished I had more of them. 

I have seen and experienced a lot over the last few months, but the one thing that has been on my radar lately is the unfailing, faithful work of God through His followers. It's amazing to me how God chooses to do His work through us. It's not like He has any obligation to. He doesn't owe us to partner with Him. It's not like we struck some kind of deal with God that if we "give" our hearts to Him, He will work through us. It's just something He does... He does it all the time. Over the last few months I have seen normal everyday people do extraordinary things, not by their own power, but through the power of the Holy Spirit working in and through them. 

I spoke with someone who was haunted by mistakes of the past... and when we spoke, it was like God was revealing to them the unbelievable power that He has over the lies of the Accuser. I didn't do or say anything special... neither did the person I was talking to. But God still displayed the weight of His authority. It was a "lightbulb" moment for both of us. We saw the face of God in a conversation of pain and regret... and hope was born. Why does He do that? How does He do that? I'm so glad I don't know. I like not having the capability of understanding the enormity of God or the reason for His work. The experience is all I need. 

God displays Himself like this all of the time through people. That's church for me! Church is when I see the work of God through people. We are incapable of doing anything good with out the work of God in us. All that you do is not a result of who you are... it's about who is working through you. That gives me a whole new appreciation for my mission in this world. I don't want people to see me. Because if they see me... they will see a distraction. I want you to see God... through me, not because of what I do, but because of what He is doing in and through me. 

May your life be about His reflection. May your work be about the privilege of having the Creator working through you. May your conversations be the very words of God exhaling from your soul... and may your heart be that of His. 

ceci n'est pas une pipe....

When I was a kid my parents used to take me to visit an older man at his house. I don't really recall how my family knew him or why we went over his house,... in fact it may have even been my great-grandfather, i'm really not sure. The only thing I remember is that he used to always smoke a pipe, and when I was there I felt safe and comfortable. To this day I love the smell of pipe tobacco. When I smell it, it takes me back to a place in my memories where I can't help but sense contentment. 

I think we can all relate to this experience. For some reason, unbeknownst to us, our senses can arouse deep heartfelt feelings that take us back in time to specific moments and places. These sensory voyages can often be celebrated and warm,... but not always. Sometimes our newly acquired awareness conjures up feelings we wished we hadn't awoken. Feelings of fear, guilt, or even shame in pursuit to tear open the freshly healed wounds marked by their all too familiar scars. Regardless of the nature of these sensory experiences, one thing remains when you sift through the aftermath...the feelings are not a result of the trigger. I know it sounds confusing but hear me out on this. You see, a lot of times when we have a significant experience in life; whether good or bad, the effects of that experience roots itself in the core of our soul. There is a greater spiritual significance that gets lost, in fact we lose what that moment is actually about. For example, if I feel uncomfortable and vulnerable... I don't need to smoke a pipe to change my emotions. That would be ridiculous. Yet followers of Christ do this all the time!

I see this erroneous concept played out when it comes to our relationship with God. Many times we equate the location of one significant experience with God as a place where we need to go to experience the weight of God again. For example, if you had an "awakening" experience on a camping trip where you felt the glory of God in the beauty of his creation... you don't need to return back to that spot to experience that which you hunger for. Although that location will always serve as a monumental reminder of your experience... it's not necessary for an experience with God. 

So, my question is this... how do followers of Christ connect spiritually to the Creator without what seems like rare "inspired" experiences? I think we easily get caught up in thinking we can only connect with God occasionally when everything lines up right, but the truth is that every moment we live is drenched with the presence of God. When we experience moments where we feel God in our midst... it's not that God has decided to show up for an hour and then leave for more important things. God is always present, we just don't realize or acknowledge it. Psalm 139:7-10 speaks to this truth. It says: 

 7 Where can I go from your Spirit? 

       Where can I flee from your presence?

 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; 

       if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, 

       if I settle on the far side of the sea,

                              10 even there your hand will guide me,                                             your right hand will hold me fast.

Regardless of where you've been or what your experiences have etched on your heart,... know this - the Creator of this world is always with you wherever you go and your mistakes do not define you. God wants nothing more than to spend more sacred moments with you... His beloved. You don't need a sacred spot to encounter God. God is already there waiting for you to recognize Him!  

choose to trust...

The "busy" season of my summer has just begun. My plane touched down in Atlanta a few hours ago and as usual, my head can't stop ruminating about the laundry list of things to come. The emotional concoction is a mix of mainly anticipation and anxiety. I'm excited about what the next few weeks will hold. Today I'm in Atlanta for strategic partner meetings at North Point Church and the following two weeks I will be in Michigan for Surf City. My excitement for the next few weeks is totally justifiable considering i'll be at North Point connecting with some of the most incredible church family you would ever want to be in a room with and i'll be heading to a camp that has arguably had the most significant impact on the youth of Pittsburgh for the last 25 years. I've got plenty to be excited about. I am extremely privileged to be a part of what God is doing in Pittsburgh. 

Unfortunately as I said before my recipe of emotions doesn't just have a healthy dose of excitement... it also has more than one helping of anxiety. I have really been feeling the itch lately. It's like a bug bite that doesn't go away and you know that scratching it will never help but you do it anyway. Worrying about things in the future never makes the future better... but I do it anyway. Anxiety is something that permeates everything I do and I can't help but be embarrassed by the stranglehold it has on me. I'm sure that I am not alone. This is a snag that I believe many of us get caught in everyday. Anxiety is not healthy and is a bigger problem than many of us like to admit. But we have to face a truth... anxiety is wrong and it's a sin. Trust me, i've tried looking at it at every angle, but I can't find cause for "healthy anxiety." It clearly says in Phil. 4, "Do not be anxious about anything." You really can't get much clearer than that. 

I recently read some great stuff on the obstacles of anxiety and worry. Unfortunately, what I read made me realize how toxic worrying truly is. In his book Crazy Love, Francis Chan wrote, "Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of  what's happening in our lives." Those words struck me deep. I immediately realized an arrogance that was hidden behind my eyes. Did I truly believe that my God was that small? Has my Savior turned his back and ignored my suffering and concerns? How could I let such a senseless belief dominate my time and my being? It doesn't make sense!

God is bigger than your concerns and He knows your heart. You can't second guess God's plan for your life... because when you let anxiety influence your day-to-day life you are just wasting your time. You are telling God that you don't believe He cares. So, what drives your thoughts on your way to work in the morning? What demands your attention in the late hours of the night when you are trying to fall asleep? The Creator of this world is in control and our lives are designed to point to Him. How much of your time is consumed by worry? Let's try to use that time for something worth while! 

time well spent...

I had so much fun spending the day with friends and family yesterday. There is nothing like having a day like the 4th of July to catch up with old friends and connect with the ones you love. I got to share stories, play some frisbee golf, and laugh until my face hurt. My highlight of the day was riding in the car with my brother to fireworks. We were messing around with the Photo Booth program on my Macbook. It was hilarious. We laughed uncontrollably at our creations.

It was a great day! It reminded me of how thankful I am to feel like I'm part of something bigger than me. It means so much to be surrounded by a group of people who love you and support you through the good and the bad. When I'm with those people I never worry whether or not I'm impressing them or if it looks like I have it all together. Those people know me. They've seen me on the mountain summit and in the damp depths of the valleys. I am me and they wouldn't have it any other way. As wonderful as it is to be a part of a family, I am haunted by the fact that this just isn't everyone's reality. Truth is that this world is populated with a half awake society who don't know the warmth of community. Droves of people walk around everyday in the silence of solitary. Do you know what it feels like to be alone? 

I was reading the story of Zacchaeus recently and I was blown away with his encounter with Jesus. The story is in Luke 19. Zacchaeus was a local outcast, a greedy tax collector who robbed his already poor community by over taxing them and reaping all the benefits. Zacchaeus hears that this miracle worker, Jesus was coming through town and everyone was buzzing about the amazing things he was doing with the sick and lame. Like anyone who has been captivated by the talk of stunning performances, Zacchaeus was determined to see the show. Being vertically challenged, (a.k.a. short) Zaachaeus climbed a tree for a better view. Jesus shows up and strikes up a conversation with Zaachaeus and then invited himself over to his house for dinner. Kind of rude of Jesus,... but it worked! Over dinner Jesus makes such a huge impact on Zacchaeus that Zacchaeus decides to change his life and start over.

A great story,... I love this story. In light of thinking about family and feeling part of something bigger, the story of Zacchaeus opened my eyes to Jesus' approach to a lonely soul. You see, Jesus didn't just notice someone who was lonely and give him a kind word or some food to eat. Jesus didn't just recognize Zacchaeus. Jesus invested time in him. This is where I believe a lot of Christians get caught up. It seems to me that when we try to live like Jesus we try to notice those people who are lonely or outsiders. We try to be really good at saying hi to the loner at the lunch table or commenting on the co-worker's new dress even if we don't like it. We do our best to spread "God's love" by making nice and neat comments. But Jesus doesn't stop where many of us do! Jesus is more than just nice! Jesus spends the evening with Zacchaeus over dinner and coffee. Jesus invests in him and listens and spends hours with him. This proves to Zacchaeus that Jesus believes he is valuable. Jesus was a busy dude. He had a lot of healing to do... yet he still sees an opportunity to change someone's life by making him feel valuable and proving it by the time he spent with him. 

This world needs more than just friendly people who make nice comments. There's nothing wrong with being friendly, and there's nothing wrong with nice comments. But if that is all you have to offer, you are coming up way short on what it means to be like Jesus. This desperate world needs people who are going to invest in the lonely and sometimes that means putting aside your own time for the sake of others and the sake of Christ. Don't try to tell me your time is more important than Jesus'. When you invest in people... it changes lives... just look at Zacchaeus!

 

can I have your story...

All last week I was speaking at a Camp called Suncrest. It was a great time and I totally enjoyed hanging out with some awesome high schoolers! On thursday night I shared a message based on the importance of sharing our stories. Our life stories have power and regardless of where we've been and what mess we've been through, God still wants to use us to redeem this world and partner with us to bring all things back to the way they were created to be. 

There is something powerful in sitting back and hearing people share their stories. Something deep and spiritual happens when you look an individual in the eye and they show you their soul. I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but when I take time to hear someone share their story, I get glimpses of the Spirit. When you take time to really listen when someone bares it all, with no strings attached, it reveals a holy authenticity founded only in the image of our flawless Creator. You sense the masterful work of His blueprint for their life. God takes the mess and makes something beautiful. I love that. 

Our stories are undeniable affirmation that God is at work in this world and everyone around you can be a captive audience. You just need to be willing and ready to be a storyteller. Our stories have power and they breed hope. People will look at what you've endured and come to the conclusion that if you've been there and you keep going, then maybe they can keep going too! We need your stories.

So this is what I want to do, I want to make this a place where others can read your stories and be inspired by what God has brought you out of. I want this to be a place where people will get glimpses of a holy authenticity that can only come from our Creator. I want to share your stories. So this is my plan... I need you to email me your stories and I will regularly post them on this blog. They can be short, they can be long, they can be whatever you want. They just have to be your story. Your story must also include a picture to represent you or your story. Let God use your story to inspire others. Let your story breed hope in a world that is desperate for it. You can email your story to me at:  rgage4@yahoo.com 

my walk of shame....

"The Love of God is Absolute"

-Billy Graham

I was reminded again this week of how much I love my small group. It's no wonder that the early church exploded overnight. If it was anything like my small group I can understand why everyday people were divinely inspired to do amazing things for the glory of God. This past week we were discussing how difficult it is to actually live out our faith. We found that many of us tiptoe on the tightrope of casual Christianity because of either fear, lack of confidence, or laziness. It's so easy to write off these deficiencies as actually waiting for the right moment. I mean think about it... how many times have you not chosen to speak up about something that you know is wrong because you're afraid you will be viewed as "that guy". Or how about this one... you would rather just not address that issue because it would just take too much time... and you are sure that God has someone else better equipped to deal with that person. I find myself arguing with that voice in the back of my head on a daily basis... and I think he's getting tired of the excuses. 

I was reading some old notes this afternoon and I came across this quote from Billy Graham. It kind of hit me right between the eyes. It's such a simple statement. The love of God is absolute. I find that statement to be so simple and true in it's very nature but my blurred reality seems to redefine it. I sing it's validity everyday but my casual stroll through life doesn't match the tune. 

As a follower of Jesus I am supposed to see the world with the eyes of the Savior but I don't. I am blinded by my own desires and lack of effort. There are people that I come in contact with that drive me crazy. There are people who desire my attention and I let myself get distracted by the next person in line. There are people I avoid because I don't want them to "bring me down". I choose my own comforts and cravings nine times out of ten and I'm getting tired of the lip service. 

I have been challenged recently to focus more on loving with the absolute love of God. Loving others regardless of their labels and regardless of my benefit. Everyday people are given the opportunity to chose Heaven or Hell... and I'm tired of letting Hell be an option. I want to create more opportunities for redemption... whatever that looks like. Maybe it's complementing that coworker who makes my blood boil or maybe it's taking the time to notice and listen to that person without looking for what's in it for me. All I know is this world needs more glimpses of Heaven and I can't wait around for other people to create them. It's our job as believers to reclaim this world. So what does that mean for you? How are you going to create more opportunities for people to choose Heaven?